How to avoid misunderstandings and improve clarity in communication

People who are unsociable often complain that they are not understood. This prevents them from making acquaintances, making friends, and leading an active lifestyle. On wedaf.com you can communicate with different people and make friends, and it is easier than it seems. But before you start socializing, it is important to deal with the reasons for misunderstandings.

Causes of miscommunication

Our perception of people depends on many factors. Some people communicate easily, make friends and are understood by everyone, while others try to convey simple things to others, but remain misunderstood. More often it happens because:

• The man is not clearly expressing his thoughts;
• Perception errors;
• The sentences are too long;
• Different perceptions of the same life situations and conclusions about them.

The brighter and more unusual a person is, the harder it is to find understanding, among others. Most people think in a standard and simple way. Misunderstanding is faced by those who stand out among their surroundings but have not yet found like-minded people. Sometimes misunderstanding arises for other reasons:

• Age difference;
• Lack of common interests;
• Different values;
• Not the same ideas about life and its stereotypes.

Often the reason for misunderstanding is the inability to speak one’s mind or hesitation in what seems obvious to others. For example, in matters of self-determination, work or family formation. Sometimes even appearance, incomprehensible to others, becomes the cause of rejection and alienation. In this case, benevolence helps to achieve understanding.

How personal beliefs and experiences influence perception

People are born with different capacities and not in the same life conditions. Even in the same situation they come to different conclusions. There are many life stories in literature when twins who received the same upbringing were radically different from each other.

A person’s beliefs are most influenced by:

• Personal experience: depending on it, one draws one’s own conclusions;
• Parenting: most people either blindly trust their parents or protest what is imposed on them;
• Relationships with friends, peers;
• Life situations that a person faces most often (loneliness, popularity, misunderstanding, being ignored).

Most people understand what fits their beliefs and stereotypes. Over the years, attitudes become entrenched, often leading to generational conflict. The younger a person is, the more flexible his or her thinking is. People who choose creative professions are better able to perceive the unusual than their pragmatic peers.

Overly complex or abstract expressions that create misunderstandings

People often fail to understand each other because they are presented with information that is too difficult to comprehend. Sometimes shyness plays a key role in misunderstandings: a person is shy to express his/her thoughts, and he/she is considered insincere and arrogant.

There are several techniques to overcome the barrier of misunderstanding:

• The development of speech, literary syllable enriches the vocabulary and helps to express their thoughts more clearly;
• Shyness is often perceived as insincerity and arrogance;
• Most people, when they see a kind attitude, are ready to respond in kind;
• Avoiding confusing and incomprehensible phrases.

Often people are repulsed in socializing:

• Vagueness and uncertainty of the purpose of communication;
• Too confusing, meaningless phrases and words;
• Rudeness;
• Excellence;
• The urge to edify;

In order to achieve understanding, it is important to choose a simple topic that the interlocutor will like. It is better to start communication with simple questions to which the interlocutor knows exactly the answer.

Lack or excess of information in the transmission of a message

People appreciate friendliness, specificity in communication and lack of intrusiveness. In addition, each interlocutor has his or her own personal comfort zone, where he or she allows only those closest to him or her.

Lack of information is as repulsive as its excess. For example, if a person does not introduce himself, writes little about himself, he is considered unfriendly. And if he tells too much, prying into the soul, they do not want to be friends with him. To avoid lack and overabundance of information in communication, avoid complex sentences. Instead of: “tell me what you are doing tonight and where you go for a walk” you can ask: “where is the best place to rest in your city”. If the interlocutor answers, then ask if he or she is going for a walk in the near future.

Communication easily turns into a monologue if a person does not follow the rules of communication.

How brevity and specificity help avoid ambiguity

Here are the rules psychologists have come up with to avoid misunderstandings.

• Don’t be afraid to answer questions and talk about yourself. But, it is important not to turn this story into an autobiographical poem of ten messages.
• You show goodwill. You can always feel it.
• Feel free to ask counter questions, clarify information.
• You may not answer questions you don’t like, you may avoid answering them.
• If you are misunderstood, clarify the information.
• Show respect for your interlocutor’s time.

Short but precise phrases help to find understanding faster. We wish you pleasant, good friendships and pleasant communication.