How self-esteem affects shyness

Raising self-esteem is an urgent problem in the modern world, where many people live in dependence on the assessment of outsiders, likes and comments on social networks. Focusing on the opinion of others, people have lost the ability to adequately and adequately evaluate themselves. They tend to compare themselves with other personalities, and if suddenly found minuses or inconsistencies, they begin to beat themselves up, criticize their actions or appearance, and try to change. But the new image does not bring the satisfaction they expect.

All this is because nowadays many people suffer from low self-esteem. It can be the cause of various problems of a person in ordinary life. The first of them is a strong shyness, which sometimes interferes in important matters.

What self-esteem affects

An adequate level of self-esteem makes a person confident in himself and his abilities. Such a person can easily achieve great success in career, win the hearts of the opposite sex and be effective in social life. But those whose assessment of their own abilities is not far from zero, are often lost, shy, and therefore are rarely successful.

Low self-esteem directly affects the character of a person, making him extremely shy, alienated, secretive, avoiding increased attention to his person, as well as communication with people.

Signs of low self-esteem

• A person who has low self-esteem is dependent on the opinions of others about him or herself. Daily comparisons of themselves and their achievements with other people become the norm;
• Regular thoughts of a negative nature on various occasions, self-doubt: “I won’t succeed”, “I won’t be able to cope”, “what others will think of me”, etc.;
• The words “It won’t work”, “it’s impossible”, “I’m not sure” are often used in colloquial speech
• Don’t know how to say “No!” to other people;
• The person is extremely shy, does not know how to accept compliments, so in response to them begins to make excuses;
• Often apologizes, even if it is inappropriate in a particular situation;

Causes of underestimation of personality

There are many nuances that could form a person’s low level of self-esteem. From which then develops stiffness, shyness, fear, cowardice and other negative personality traits.

• One of the first reasons is upbringing. After all, quite often many problems in adult children stretch from childhood. Parents, deliberately, and sometimes without even knowing it, embed in the head of their child destructive attitudes about his failure, uselessness, unimportance or even ugly. Regular comparisons with other children, endless criticism and reproaches – this is a fertile ground for a young person to form a lack of self-acceptance, low self-esteem, shyness and insecurity.
• It is quite common to get down, self-doubt, shyness and fear because of a sad experience or a series of failures that you had to endure in the past. It could be a bad date, failing a test or other unpleasantness. Another would not be particularly worried about it, and would quickly forget. But a person who was indoctrinated from childhood that he is not capable of anything, such situations only confirm their own beliefs.
• The environment also plays a role in the formation of a person. If at school you were an outcast or an object of ridicule and bullying, you will take all these feelings and attitudes with you into adulthood. Then you will not be able to object to the boss at work, refuse colleagues or also become a constant object of criticism, which undoubtedly affects self-esteem and shyness.
• Various health problems or aesthetic imperfections of appearance are also one of the reasons why the level of self-esteem is close to zero. After all, such people are often bullied or laughed at school or on the street, they rarely want to socialize with them, so they become lonely, and sometimes even outcasts of society. All this pain, resentment and negativity they carry through the years, old and in adulthood. Of course, this is accompanied by fears, shyness, insecurity.
• It is also possible to develop low self-esteem in adulthood. If you have a long-term relationship with manipulators, abusers, perfectionists, they can make you believe that you are worthless, unimportant, unlovable, and more.

You can overcome shyness and cope with low self-esteem with the help of virtual communication. For example, on wedaf.com you can find nice people to talk to and interesting personalities with whom it is easy to establish contact. In conversation with new acquaintances you can learn to overcome shyness, try to practice your self-confidence and make sure that someone needs you, you are appreciated and you are glad to meet you.