How to communicate with difficult people

There are more than 8 billion people in the world, but sometimes it is difficult to find a common language even with those who are close to you. It is always easy to establish contact with a simple and friendly person, because you will immediately find points of contact, common topics or interests. But there are also quite complex representatives of society, with whom to build a dialog – it is a task with an asterisk. However, such personalities are far from rare – with them it is quite possible to encounter at work, in the bank or other institutions. Therefore, it is important to learn how to communicate with difficult people too. To do this, it is necessary to follow certain rules.

Tune in to the conversation

If you are going to have a conversation with a rather difficult person, it is advisable to prepare for it in advance. You need to adopt a certain position so that your body feels supported – you can sit on a chair or lean on the wall, the main thing is balance. You should only discuss topics that are important to you, and don’t forget the purpose for which you started this contact.

If there is a probability that the interlocutor will provoke you to show emotions, you can use a lifehack – find a point or a detail of clothing in front of you, looking at which you will feel psychological balance, restraining your feelings.

Set yourself up for compromise instead of conflict

When starting a difficult conversation with a loved one, it is important to say to yourself in advance: “I am starting this conversation to establish communication and be with you, not to provoke a quarrel. It’s important to remember that in a dialogue your goal is to come to a common solution, not to win the battle. If you are talking to your child, you need to be at eye level, be sure to touch him/her, showing your warmth, and at the end say, “I am always with you!”

Be frank

Other people have the right not to like us and not to believe us, not to understand us and not to agree with us – you have to take this as a given. Try to understand the deeper meaning in the words of the interlocutor. To do this, you need to be calm and look at the situation objectively, remaining open and sincere during the conversation.

Respect the person you’re communicating with

Everyone is entitled to misconceptions, imperfections and mistakes. However, you should still treat him with respect. After all, you too can be wrong about something. Allow yourself to learn from your mistakes. And remember that the opponent’s respect for us always depends on whether you respect yourself.

Treat the interlocutor and his/her characteristics with understanding

Each person reacts differently to the same situations or circumstances. After all, everyone perceives information according to their own feelings and personal experience. Don’t be shy to ask questions again. Each of you will need time to assimilate the data received. It is better to use the pronoun “I” rather than “You” in conversation (e.g., I am offended, I feel, I think, I am angry).

Know how to separate your feelings from others

During a conversation, it is common for people to project their desires and thoughts onto the other person. In the same way, someone else’s opinion or feelings may be imposed on you in return. It is necessary to be able to clearly distinguish between your true desires and feelings, while remaining in harmony with yourself.

Communicate with your interlocutor as an equal

There is a phrase “Being on the same wavelength”. In building a constructive dialog, it is very important to observe this rule. Try to understand at the beginning of the conversation what mood your opponent is in, what is bothering him at the moment. It is necessary to choose words, so that a funny joke does not come out later sideways. If a person behaves aloof and reserved, your cheerful manner of communication may irritate him or lead to a conflict.

Don’t be manipulated

When you communicate with a clearly aggressive person, it is necessary to get out of such a dialogue during the time, not taking accusations or claims on your own account. This type of person quite often resorts to manipulation, constantly using the pronoun “We” in conversation.

You may also encounter passive aggressors. They usually say only good things to your face, but behind your back or in your wake they may say unpleasant words. Here the main thing is to feel the inner balance, without taking on a total sense of guilt or hyper-responsibility. After such a difficult contact, it is important to have a good rest, restoring both moral and physical strength.

Don’t get personal

Do not judge a person’s personality or characteristics. Discuss only the specific event or fact that is the subject of the dialog. If the conversation is clearly escalating into a conflict or dispute, there is no point in continuing. Try to defuse a difficult situation with a joke, if appropriate.

Show the man that you care about him

In such a situation, you can try to say to yourself, “I value your opinion and your feelings, even if I don’t agree with you in this situation. Let the interlocutor know that you value him/her.

Learn from your mistakes

Ending the conversation properly is also extremely important. Any phrase will do, such as: “Thanks for the conversation! See you later.” Analyze how the conversation went, realize where you went wrong, so that in the future you do not repeat the same. A confident person is not afraid to say what he or she feels at the moment, knows how to be grateful and accepts compliments correctly.

Train your communication skills, follow the rules of dialog with difficult people, and then the result will not make you wait! And on wedaf.com you can find a lot of interesting personalities with whom it is interesting to communicate. Here you can make new friends and learn how to build a proper dialog with different people.